Starcrossed || Forty-Nine

Jared woke up to the tantalizing smell of herbs and cream simmering with something more substantial. His near-empty stomach growled needily, and he inhaled the savory scent with a deep sight.

"Something smells good." He mumbled groggily. Still half asleep, the man was barely aware as his fingers wound more possessively around Elise, bringing her closer to his parted lips.

The sound of a pleasant (and sleepy) voice drew Elise out of her deep slumber. Her eyes opened slowly and she found herself closer to his face than when she'd fallen asleep. She smiled sleepily and planted a kiss on the corner of his mouth without even hesitating.

She ran her hand along his bottom lip to help him wake up a little faster and rested her head on his cheek. A glance to the side revealed that Kaye and Sean were awake and watching the food forming. A faint dusting of pink colored her cheeks, but Elise didn't care to tiptoe around things anymore. Her time with Jared was precious, and she didn't see a reason to hide anything from the others at this point. They'd been through too much.

"Jared," she murmured softly, unable to hold back the faint singsong tone in her voice. "Time to wake up," she cajoled him further. Even though she was coaxing him out of the fog of sleep, Elise would be lying if she said she minded him holding her so close.

A pleased hum rumbled through Elise. Jared's hands shifted around her, turning her so she faced the ceiling, and his soft lips found her blushing cheek. He kissed her again once more. The motion was becoming so familiar after their ample practice last night- a fact he was proud of.

Their eyes finally met when he set her back on her side a foot away from his face, and more of him was within view. His hazel eyes briefly flitted around their hideout, ensuring it wasn't breached. By the look of Kate's use of the fire-pit nearby with those shallow bowls of food, it looked like everything was just fine for the time being.

Kate sent him a brief look, averting her gaze quickly to give the budding couple a semblance of privacy. Turning his attention back to the beautiful, tiny woman before him, Jared couldn't fight the warm look that the sight of her induced. It was so wonderful and crazy to think that she was just as happy to be in a giant's arms. To be with him, of all people. The euphoria of falling in love with her was enough to numb the ache from sleeping on a thin mat atop a lumpy floor.

"Dreams?" He asked, raising his eyebrows inquisitively.

A soft smile remained painted on Elise's face while she drank in his appearance. The exhaustion that had weighed down his expression seemed to have melted away. So he must have slept as deeply as she had, and the thought only broadened her smile.

"Very sweet," she answered truthfully. She had replayed Jared's return to clarity in her mind. She'd dreamt of huddling close to him while the sun rose over a rainy landscape. His heartbeat beneath her had provided the rhythm for a swirl of colors and moonlight, while in her subconscious he leaned over her to plant kisses on her face and shoulders, and caress her curves with his hands.

"And you? Did I chase the nightmares away, or could I use some practice?" she asked playfully, her voice still a little quiet from her recent waking.

Jared couldn't help but smile anew at her little quip. The idea of Elise getting aggressive -even with something as intangible like his less savory dreams- was outright adorable.

"You're a natural." He assured her. Despite knowing Kaye was watching on, he couldn't help himself anymore. So tired of holding back how he felt for this woman that was slowly slipping through his fingers. Jared indulged himself in smoothing his thumb across her cheek up to her hair-line, gingerly smoothing back her messy ebony hair. "Though, I gotta say. No dream compares to the real thing."

Elise's eyelids fluttered closed and her smile widened. His glowing compliment settled on her like a blanket, filling her with pride and ecstasy that he would think so about her. About her! Just some diplomat, some alien. She met his hazel eyes again, her own green ones mirroring his sentiment. "I love you," she whispered simply, the words falling from her lips like soft rays of light.

Her hand found his thumb as it tenderly brushed along her hair. She could practically feel the heat that came off of his hand, with it hovering so near. With his support, Elise pulled herself to a sitting position, and she thanked him with a kiss on the tip of his finger. It was such a novel thing, but Elise wouldn't trade it for anything.

Jared's hand settled over her lap while Elise stretched her arms over her head. Then, she ran her palm along the back of his hand, back and forth in a steady rhythm. "I do believe I heard your stomach demanding food," she announced.

"Oh please.  Everyone heard that," Sean piped up. He was still waiting for his portion of the food Kaye had prepared to cool down. He had been content to let the two of them have their moment for a while. But he wasn't about to let it drag on for too long while there were others in the room.

Blushing promptly, Jared pushed himself up to a sitting position atop the simple, auto-adjusting mat.

"Wasn't that loud," He said with a sheepish chuckle. He moved closer to Kaye, leaning over to get a look at the simmering food. Sean looked possessive of his portion as the giant leaned over with a hungry gleam in his eyes, and Jared had to try not to laugh.

"Pasta," Kaye announced proudly. She slapped his hand as Jared attempted to snag a noodle stuck to the side of the bowl. "Hey! I don't want hand-flavored pasta. Wash your hands."

She tossed a towel at him from the extra supplies she'd unloaded from the aircraft. It was already wetted down with a faint soapy smell on one half, matted from use to wash her own hand. Jared scoured his hands front and back, ridding them of built up grease, dirt, and dust from their escape. Turning over his shoulder, he laid out a wet corner for Elise on the floor for her turn.

"Elise first." Kaye announced, dropping a tiny, makeshift bowl in front of Elise. This time, the bowls were handmade: broad metal nuts glued to a piece of laser-cut plastic from the soap package. It wasn't the best long term solution, but it was a better portion control their previous attempts to cater to human size. Kaye smiled at Elise warmly, then passed Jared his serving.

"I added some vegetable powder to spruce it up a bit. Kinda messes with the aftertaste but it really beefs up the sauce." Kate smiled a tired, proud smile as she finally settled back against the wall with her piping hot bowl. "Not to brag, but I think I might be getting better at this."

"Or we're just too hungry to care." Jared couldn't help but tease.

Kaye scoffed, playfully indignant. "Well, guess what? You're on breakfast duty now."

"Fine." Jared said thickly, mouth already half full of the steaming pasta. It burned the roof of his mouth a little, but he found no room for regret. It was really tasty, and he was really hungry.

Sean wasn't about to complain about hot food. He was eating better on the run than he'd done in prison. Of course, they'd given him enough that he was never malnourished, and was basically healthy. But this stuff actually had flavor. And temperature. Even so, he ate it slowly so he wouldn't burn his tongue and lose the ability to taste the food.

As they all tucked in to their meals, Sean couldn't help but notice the comfortable silence that fell over the room. Everyone was weary, but at least they weren't starving. It was like they were all waiting for someone to start the campfire songs.

Elise sat with her legs tucked under her, like she always did, politely eating her portion of pasta. Despite the rundown appearance of their hideout and the makeshift build of their corner of the convenience store, it felt kind of cozy to be sitting together enjoying a meal. After the frantic chase out of Orsno, they all needed this chance to relax and recuperate from the stress.

And to consider the cost. While she was elated to finally be able to sit close to Jared again after so many days of wondering if he'd ever recover, their recent loss still weighed heavily on Elise's mind. Hopefully Neburn’s sacrifice would not be wasted. She owed it to him to uncover the conspiracy between humans and Tessira. And, maybe, space travel from this planet would become a possibility, one that he might be proud to have had a hand in.

"Elise. Why do you always sit like that to eat?" Sean asked, finally giving in to his curiosity. He looked over at her from his cross-legged seat, wondering if there was a story to the way she sat so politely all the time.

Elise glanced down and smiled softly. It was just such a habit for her, that she'd never put much thought into the way she sat. "Hmm. Well, my grandmother was Korean. She married a Frenchman, but she was used to sitting on the floor like this. She raised my mom to sit like this, and mom passed the habit along to me." She shrugged and set her bowl on the floor in front of her. "It's easier for me to sit like this than the way you're sitting, actually. I'm just too used to it," she chuckled.

"Huh. I don't think I woulda guessed," Sean answered, tilting his head. In truth, it almost looked uncomfortable, to sit on her knees like that. But perhaps, being raised that way, she hardly even felt it. He fell silent as he got back to his food, wondering whether one of the giants in the room would ask what "Korean" meant, and which one would give in to the curiosity first. It caused a smirk to ghost across his face.

Kaye made a confused face. Over the humans heads, she mouthed "What's a Frenchman?" to Jared.

Jared, in turn, shrugged and made an equally bewildered face. Just because he had the most hours racked up on time spent chatting with Elise didn't mean he was an expert on human culture.

"I think it's some sort of title." He whispered.

Despite their best efforts to be private, Kaye and Jared found the other two were staring up at them with amused expression. Jared chuckled, sending Elise a sheepish smile. "Don't mind us."

Elise's smile broadened. Her gaze had been drawn upwards when she heard their furtive whispering, and she realized rather belatedly that two people in the room had no idea about the different countries on Earth. "It's alright, sorry," she replied, the faintest sign of a giggle in her words.

"Korean just means my grandmother was from a country called Korea. My grandfather was French, which means he was born in France," she clarified easily. It wouldn't be very helpful to explain the countries too much further without a proper map, so she didn't bother. "I'm French, too."

Sean chuckled faintly, logging away the image of Jared and Kaye's confused faces above them. He was about to take another bite of his food but caught Elise looking over at him, her expression inviting him to speak on the matter, too. Really? he thought, though he didn't mind it as much as he expected.

"Oh, we're all sharing?" he quipped. "I'm Irish," he explained simply. Then, he looked up at Kaye, anticipating the questioning look on her face before he even saw it. "From Ireland."

Elise raised her eyebrows. She could only assume that he'd taken some kind of training to conceal the familiar brogue often associated with the Emerald Isle. "Really? I'm impressed." She grinned a little wider, and looked up at the Tessirans. "The Irish are normally known for having very distinct accents," she remarked, ignoring Sean's flat expression.

Jared's dark eyebrows shot up, and an intrigued smile wasn't far behind. "No kidding," he said, taking his cue from Elise's sly look to give Sean a goading grin. "And what does that sound like?"

But his excitement paled in comparison to Kaye's. She bounced where she sat. "You never told me that! Oh, Sean you have to say something Irish for us!" She said eagerly.

"She's right. Can't leave us dangling now." Jared chuckled, and all eyes remained attentively on Sean.

Sean's eyes widened only slightly as he looked back and forth between the two Tessirans. He had expected some enthusiasm, sure. But he hadn't thought he'd be put on the spot. He could feel a minor heat rising in his cheeks. He glanced at Elise, who was watching him with an encouraging smile.

"Go on, Sean," she egged him on, holding up a hand as if to pass the conversation along to him. Like she was in another negotiation. Cheeky, he thought with a roll of his eyes.

Sean turned his smirk towards Kaye, and he couldn't help a faint chuckle at how eager she was. He gave in, knowing they would probably just pester him about it until he relented. "Right, I could leave ya hangin' in anticipation, but dat would get me nowhere fast, now would it?" He shrugged, a little emboldened by the delighted expression on Kaye's face.

"Really, love, she's sellin' us short. Ireland is known fer more t'an just the talkin' fast and diff'rent. We've got countryside dey'll never stop writin' songs about." It actually felt kind of nice to speak that way, after using the flat, boring English that the Allied Planets had trained him to use, to mask his origins.

Kaye burst out into a tinkling giggle, setting her food aside to give Sean a little round of applause.

"It's like you've got a whole other person hiding inside you." Jared said, trying to stifle his chuckle into a bite of food. The way Sean looked up at him was still vastly different from the way he looked at Kaye. He got the feeling Sean might feel differently about him laughing at him, especially after everything he had put him through.

"Yeah. 'Ireland Sean' sounds like a real wild guy." Kaye said, sending him a wink as she picked up her bowl again.

Jared pursed his lips, frowning thoughtfully before nudging her in the side. "Kinda has a Röderr edge to it, doesn't it?"

Kaye mulled it over. "Kind of. Maybe mixed with a south Algem accent."

They quieted down with their meals for a moment before Jared raised his head again, swallowing so he could address Elise.

"What about you? You have any hidden accents in there from your Frenchman side?" He asked, waggling his eyebrows playfully.

After Sean finished his little demonstration, he fell into what looked like a thoughtful silence. Elise was beginning to recognize the way his eyes got a little vacant when he was remembering something. No doubt he'd just stirred up a lot of memories.

She smiled as they all fell silent for a moment, and her grin slowly widened until Jared finally asked the question she had fully expected. She laughed and gazed right up at him, meeting his playful expression with her own. "But of course I do," she answered easily, her vowels tightening into the close French sound. Since she had learned both French and English growing up, it had been much easier for her to train away her accent when she began her training as a diplomat. But it was just as easy to slip back into it.

"Zere are some sounds in French zat do not exist in ozzer languages, and ze reverse is also true," she explained, her fondness for such subtleties showing on her face. Language, as a communication device, was amazing with all its intricacies and widespread differences. It was only too bad that some people didn't want to listen to simple words. "Per'aps I 'ave too strong a bias, but I always loved zis way to speak. Naturel." She glanced over at Sean, including his natural dialect in her statement.

She glanced sheepishly back up at Jared, smiling a little bit shyly while she awaited his assessment. Her speaking had brought a soft look to his face, a thoughtful expression as he mulled it over. "What do you sink?" she asked, looking over at Kaye briefly before turning her attention back to Jared's hazel eyes, eyes that sometimes seemed so deep that she could fall right into them.

"I sink it's very impressive." He replied, the French falling off the words sloppily.

Kaye snickered, covering her mouth with her hand for the humans' benefit. Though he joined her in a round of light laughter, a blush tinged his cheeks.

"And now I'm thinking I'm gonna leave the accent work to you two." Jared said, dragging a hand through his hair self-consciously.

"Oh no, that was spot-on, Jay." Kaye teased shamelessly. She spun her amused grin towards Elise. "Am I right?"

It definitely wasn't the first time she'd heard someone attempt to mimic her accent. There were always varying degrees of success. Jared's attempt had been quite endearing, and her smile lingered even as she met Kaye's look. "It was lovely," she replied, her voice sliding back out of her accent almost seamlessly.

"You got the important part down, at least," she added, looking back at Jared and hoping to help clear away some of his embarrassment. "There's no 'th' sound in French," she clarified, carefully enunciating the sound.

Sean watched their conversation with mild amusement on his face, though he hadn't joined in the laughter at Jared's mangled attempt at a French accent. Somehow, hearing one of the Tessirans' huge voices trying and failing an accent in the exact same way that some humans did was unnerving. Maybe it was his normal conversation with Kaye earlier. He didn't want to think of them as similar species.

He set his bowl aside and got to his feet slowly. Sean stretched his arms and tilted his head until he felt the faint pops in his neck. He tilted his head to look up when Kaye turned her gaze at him curiously. "I tink I'll be goin' for a walk," he explained, coming out of his own accent much slower than Elise had managed. He was well aware that there wasn't really anywhere to walk to. His only real option was the other side of the convenience store and back. Perhaps a lap around one of the dilapidated shelving units.

Elise tilted her head as he took a few steps back from their campfire. He didn't give his back to any of them right away, though that looked more like it was simple training than any specific worries. She hoped so, at least. She knew he had many reasons to be wary of the Tessirans. "Aww, leaving so soon, Sean? We haven't even heard anyone give your accent a try!"

Sean scoffed, though it seemed more like a short, wry laugh than a noise of derision. "Just givin' 'em time to practice, sweetheart," he replied with a shrug. He took a few more steps backwards, before turning to walk away from the cozy little group.

"Be safe," Elise called after him, unsure of what else to tell him. Clearly he was after some lonely brooding time. He lifted a hand in a wave, but didn't turn back to look at her.

Jared stared after him, a conflict warring within him. Sure, he hadn't done anything wrong persay in teasing the guy, but he couldn't help but feel like he was the reason Sean needed space. His gaze became more contemplative as he picked at the curly pasta lingering at the bottom of his bowl. The hazy memories he'd been trying to repress surfaced, reminding him of the monstrous guilt he was now subject to. He understood where Sean was coming from; he'd have a hard time looking at the man who had trapped him under a vase for imminent capture, too.

Jared finished up his portion, ladling an extra half noodle and some spiced sauce out for Elise before Kaye could help herself to seconds.

With a gentle clink, Jared set his dishes aside and shuffled to get on his knees.

"I hope you don't think I'm your maid." Kaye arched a slender eyebrow disapprovingly at his dirty dishes.

Jared dusted himself off, shaking his head. "Just going for a walk. I'll be back."

A knowing look crossed Kaye's face, her brown eyes glancing over to where Sean had disappeared to on the other end of the room. Jared huffed. "I gave him a head start, didn't I?" He muttered, turning away.

The gravel, leaked onto the tile floors from years of neglect, trembled under Jared's careful steps as he approached. He liked to think himself pretty stealthy, but around humans... Not so much. It was darker on this side, and he was extra careful to discern each little shape in the dark. Last thing he wanted to do would be to freak Sean out just when things were settling down.

Sean watched a pebble the size of a softball jitter along the floor in time with the giant steps. He sat leaning against the sturdy base of one of the old shelving units. He'd thought he might be able to climb up and sit on the bottom level, but it was higher than it had looked, and he was in no shape to go climbing around. Not to mention, he didn't have any of his gear. It made him a little nervous, especially since he could feel one of the Tessirans approaching.

He looked up, up, up when Jared rounded one of the other shelves. Sean felt some butterflies nervously shifting in his stomach from the perspective. What the hell does he want?! Sean absently ran one hand back through his hair, the habit that always seemed to crop up when he was uneasy.

The last time they'd had a one-on-one conversation, Jared had so tactfully reminded Sean that he could step on him with ease. Among other discouraging quips. Sean, his back still glued to the shelving unit behind him, pushed himself to stand up. It didn't help the perspective even a little bit. He glanced down at Jared's boots just once.

It should have mattered at least some that Jared's shoes weren't quite as big as the last ones that Sean had a close encounter with. Warren, flicking him across the hallway like a discarded piece of trash, had much larger shoes, fitting the rest of his menacing frame. But it really didn't matter. At least Jared didn't carry himself in a way that made him terrifying on purpose.

Rather than wait around to see if Jared noticed him there, Sean decided he'd better make his presence known. Lest he get stepped on like a snippa, whatever the frozen hell that was. "What are you looking for, buddy?" Sean called, grey eyes fixed on the face far above.

The shoes stopped short as Jared paused to find the source of the voice. He was surprised to find that even with such precautions taken, he had almost missed the small man completely.

"I was hoping to run into you, actually." Jared answered. "Obviously, not literally..." He added under his breath.

How was it that he could charm the pants off Elise but Sean somehow made him feel like this giant klutz? He looked around before taking a seat in front of Sean, leaning back against a refrigerator unit. Hopefully this was enough space for the smaller man. It was difficult to see what was stocked behind him; a generous layer of condensation fogged up the grimy glass.

"Hey, look at that!" Jared suddenly lurched to the side, grabbing a fallen package next to Sean. He pried open the plastic and cast aside the wrappings, revealing a toy about half Sean's size. The figure was a masked man with a black plastic cape over his bodysuit, frozen in a billowing dramatic fashion. He smiled, turning it over in his hand. The little eyes seemed to follow him no matter the angle.

"Not in bad condition compared to the rest of the trash here," he mused. He glanced up at Sean with a distracted smile. "I used to have one of these as a kid." Jared explained.

Sean's eyes were still a little wide. When Jared had suddenly lunged forward with a hand outstretched, he'd been sure the guy was about to grab him. The human blinked a few times, his surprise quickly morphing into a scowl, but it was clear that Jared was too distracted by what looked like a little superhero toy in his hands.

Sean met Jared's eyes warily. Where the hell is this even coming from? Still, it was a step up from their last several interactions. Sean let his gaze wander over the plastic hero that Jared held up. It was kind of bulky for a cheap convenience store toy. Or, maybe it only seemed that way because it would probably come up to his hips. He couldn't help but think that his nephew would probably like it, stupid size and all.

Sean really had to wonder what had prompted Jared to follow him to this side of the room. He supposed he would buy an excuse that the girls got to chatting and he got blocked out of the conversation. But, why Jared would come and try to casually hang out with Sean was just beyond him. They'd never gotten along from day one, despite their habit of saving each other's lives.

After a pause in which the spy's brow slowly furrowed in confusion, Sean moistened his lips to speak. "What, uh," he began, glancing side to side as if looking for some prankster hiding around a corner. "What is it?" he finally asked. "Some action hero?"

"Mmhm. Called The Dredge." Jared confirmed. "He's this shape-shifting monster birthed underground that's trying to prove he deserves to be a Tessiran by fighting crime. There's a bunch first person games featuring this guy for tablets or Vizars."

He twirled the tiny figure between his hands a few more times, relishing the nostalgic childhood memories that surfaced. He could feel Sean's eyes boring into him relentlessly, no matter how deeply he submerged into his thoughts. So Jared set the action figure aside and set his sights on the smaller man across from him.

His lips parted, hesitant before finally dredging up the crushing guilt. "Sean, listen." Jared huffed. "I um... I said a lot of things back at Neburn's place. And the things... I mean, what I did to you... I'm not proud of it. I guess, uh... what I'm trying to say," Jared cleared his throat, wondering if he could possibly make this any worse.

Sean's expression flattened even before Jared got three words stammered out. God. Please no, he thought ruefully. An awkward apology was probably the last thing either of them wanted to deal with, regardless of their past disagreements. Sean was perfectly aware that Jared hadn't been acting himself, regardless of how frighteningly close he'd come to getting everyone killed or carted off to prison and torture.

"Yeah, no, I get it," Sean interrupted quickly, holding up a hand as if to halt further words. He could see that he'd surprised the Tessiran by the shock in his giant hazel eyes. Still, even that couldn't erase all the remorse on the guy's face.

Even so, Sean didn't feel like having some heartfelt apology session. They weren't really buddies, no matter how many times Sean used the nickname. Jared could hardly stand his cocky attitude, and Sean wasn't exactly fond of most of the locals thanks to their size. Sean sighed faintly and sank back to a seated position, averting his gaze. His eyes found the plastic figure that Jared had set aside.

He mulled things over for a long time, creating a pause in which he could only imagine Jared was quite uncomfortable. How does one deal with the stony silence of someone who won't let an apology come out? After a while, Sean started to actually feel a little bad. Jared had done a lot to help, and he didn't particularly deserve the cold shoulder.

But, dammit, he wasn't going to sit through a lame apology, when both men had some crimes behind them.

"Don't, uh. Don't worry about it," he mumbled finally, still looking away from the much larger man.

Sean's scowl deepened as he recalled those days back in the government facility, waiting for Elise and Kaye to arrive. Jared had been tormented day and night there. Sean had heard it happening. The Secretary of Communications had given them some common ground by making Jared into a torture victim. "How are you holding up after ... you know." Sean finally looked back up at the Tessiran. This time, there was actual empathy behind the guarded expression on his face.

Jared let out a long sigh, his gaze turning slightly distant as he considered the question.

"I've been better," he admitted at long last. The words came out like a reluctant offering, but he had no reason to lie to a man who'd been tortured under the same authority. Jared checked the line of shelves one more time, double checking that Elise hadn't followed him over.

"Sleeping's tough." He confessed, his voice low. "Being out of control of my own body like that... It's terrifying. I wake up, wondering if I'll find blood on my hands."

He fell quiet, absently tracing the place on his chest where a circular scar had formed from repeated electrocutions. After a few moments Jared shifted, crossing his legs at the ankle and folding his arms across his chest. "Hey listen, don't... Don't tell Elise about this. She worries about me enough without thinking I'm some sort of head case."

Sean watched Jared carefully. The guy had been through some serious shit in that building, and his own guilt was most likely slowing his full recovery. "I won't tell," Sean answered honestly, even though he knew he probably couldn't sour Elise's opinion of Jared no matter how hard he tried. Even Sean's own actions, which gave the woman every right to hate him, hadn't turned her against her fellow human.

"Sleeping might get easier, you keep that girl around a few days," he offered, knowing that his own rest was often plagued with nightmares. Nightmares, and the fear that he'd wake up back in a glass cage somewhere, awaiting the next arduous experiment. But at least Jared had Elise.

Sean knew his own experiences didn't completely match Jared's. They hadn't been trying to condition him or brainwash him. All the same, he knew they had trained him well. A Tessiran could hardly move near him without Sean making himself hyper aware of where their hands were. Just in case.

Sean sighed heavily through his nose, knowing that this train of thought was inevitably leading him down memory lane. He leaned his head back, resting it against the shelf with a dull thunk as he cast his eyes toward the ceiling. Murky shadows flickered up there thanks to the campfire on the other side of the room. They didn't help much to distract his thoughts.

"Good thing we got you out of there when we did," he murmured suddenly. Much longer, and Jared might have been far out of even Elise's reach, and then they'd all have been blown sky high. "Who knows what else they would have tried on you." His gaze slid sideways to regard Jared seriously, unable to downplay just how lucky he was. "They don't run out of ideas very easily," he admitted.

"Yeah," Jared agreed haltingly. His frown settled more certainly on Sean, recognizing now the pain behind those little grey eyes.

"I don't know how you can stand to be in the same room as me after what they did to you." Jared went on in a softer voice. "When I think about what they did to me... What they almost made me do... I feel like they stole a piece of me. Something I can't get back. And you..." Jared trailed off, shaking his head. "I can see why they picked you for the top crew."

"Oh, stop it, you're making me blush," Sean chuckled dryly, the remark coming so easily to his lips even though his heart wasn't in it. He looked down, staring intently at his own shoes. They had stolen a lot from him, too, and it wasn't all just gear and a ship.

"Truth is, sometimes I almost can't stand to be in the same room," he admitted, a genuine edge to the growl in his voice. He wasn't being derisive or antagonizing. "After getting grabbed and prodded and cut and everything else so many times, it's hard not to think someone's gonna just pull open a curtain any second and end this stupid play." Like some kind of veil was pulled over his eyes to create an elaborate dream. Sometimes he entertained the possibility that they'd put him in a coma with their last trick.

Sean dragged a hand down his face, as if he might pull those thoughts loose. The pain he'd felt when getting kicked in the ribs by a shoe the size of a tank had been real. It was all, somehow, real. "Heh," he scoffed, smirking again. "I spent so many nights asking myself what would be worth saving, when they were finally through with me. It's not like anything you ever said or did was as bad as what they came up with. You might as well have tried to tickle me."

A soft, self-conscious chuckle passed through Jared's lips. He glanced down at his front, flashing back to the hazing memories back at Neburn's place and everything before. How many times has he picked up Sean as easily as he did to the little toy sitting next to him? He was a bit unsettled by the fact that he had lost count along the way. It certainly couldn't be wise to get too used to this.

"I can't tell you how many times I've tried to put myself in your shoes." Jared confessed. "I don't think it'd be fair to you guys to say imagination does it justice."

He gave a bittersweet smirk, stretching out his long legs and crossing them at the ankle. His heels landed somewhere out of sight from Sean, just beyond the edge of the shelf.

"Not that there's anything wrong with either you. Nothing wrong... But it's gotta suck being on such a low playing field day in and day out." Jared sympathized. It was a thought he'd had on multiple occasions with Elise. How small actions on his his end translated to obvious ones on her end. His Hazel eyes hardened at the persistent memory of Elise behind glass. He could only assume Sean had a threefold punishment for having been caught in the act. It made him sick.

Sean raised an eyebrow. Low playing field, now there's a way to put it, he thought wryly. Before seeing Elise, Sean had thought that maybe he'd be on that playing field until the day he died. "I kinda forgot what it's like. To be normal." He chuckled, a detached sound that sounded incredulous and hurt at the same time. "I mean, the fact that you could hurl me across the room any time doesn't bother me as much as the fact that I'm used to feeling so..." his voice trailed off.

Helpless. Weak. Tiny.

They didn't seem like words that should belong to a soldier like him. But here, they did. His grey eyes seemed caught somewhere between shame and fond memories. "Sure, I can remember being home, being pretty damn tall if you'll believe me," he chuckled, glancing up to catch the look on Jared's face as he attempted to imagine it. "But then I also remember some guy, skinny as a rail and more than a head shorter than you, being able to keep me still in one hand while the other moved in with a needle thick as my thumb." He held up a hand thumb-up for emphasis.

Sean sighed with frustration, wondering what made him decide to say any of that. Maybe it was a side effect of the numbing salve. It wasn't like Jared had asked. He cast his eyes to the ceiling again as he slowly realized it. "So I guess there's really not much I can do to be grateful enough, since you're the one who finally took their collar off me. Literally. And then you're always looking out for Elise, who they haven't had a chance to break yet."

Sean paused to let his almost-thank-you sink in. Then, he shook his head and snickered faintly. "All this heart-to-heart needs is a cooler a' beers," he quipped.

Jared's serious expression dissolved in a light chuckle. "Yeah," He agreed heartily, feigning understanding for the sake of the moment.

What the heck is 'beer'?